Have you been through a traumatic or toxic relationship and are unsure if you’re recovering?
Worry no more because, in this article, you’ll learn the indicative signs that you’re healing from a toxic relationship.
What kind of relationship can you classify as toxic?
A relationship between two people characterized by abusive behaviors from one or both parties is considered toxic. And usually, these hurts experienced can profoundly impact one’s body, feelings, or thoughts.
While many think toxic relationships are often romantic, toxicity can occur in other relationships. And that includes family and work relationships or friendships.
That said, people in toxic relationships are always advised to talk to someone they trust as a first step to breaking from them. This person can be their parent, teacher, or counselor, as the case may be.
Meanwhile, here are some things that can make a relationship toxic:
- Emotional abuse
- Physical abuse
- Verbal abuse
- Controlling behavior
Want to get a book that talks about this subject in depth? You can get my BOOK.
7 Signs You’re healing from a Toxic Relationship
The signs that you’re healing from a toxic relationship can be tricky to decipher. But when you’re sensitive to your emotional and behavioral patterns, you can spot them, even without living close to a therapist.
And while healing from a toxic relationship is a process that takes time and effort, here are some signs that you may be on the path to recovery:
1. Increased self-awareness
Undoubtedly, toxic relationships can make you feel sad or upset. But when you start healing, you become more self-aware. And you begin to notice why you feel the way you do.
And that way, you can understand how these things make you sad. When that happens, you start doing what can help you feel better.
Interestingly, that might include taking deep breaths, meditating, or writing about your feelings in a diary. You might also talk to someone you trust, like a friend or a counselor.
That way, you see yourself learning to take care of your feelings, and, in turn, you become happier and feel better. And, of course, you become ready to have better relationships in the future.
2. Setting healthy boundaries
As you gain more self-awareness, you begin to observe that you’re conscious of how people treat you. More than ever.
And while memories of how your partner had been treated in the past pop up in your mind, you promise yourself not to allow that to happen again.
And now, you know that you don’t have to put up with rude or disrespectful behavior. And in turn, you become more assertive than you’ve ever been. Meaning you now stand up for yourself and communicate your needs and wants.
You might say things like this to people who treat you disdainfully:
- “I don’t like it when you talk to me like that”
- “Please stop doing that.”
And that way, you show others that you value yourself and your feelings. Consequently, you can create healthier relationships with people who treat you well and respect your boundaries.
3. Taking responsibility for your happiness
Many people in relationships believe that their partners are responsible for their happiness.
But that’s not 100% true.
As someone who’s healing from a toxic relationship, you might start to realize that it’s essential to make yourself happy too!
And more than ever, you see yourself learning how to create happiness and joy for yourself. But that happens by doing things that make you feel good, like spending time with friends, engaging in activities you love, and trying new things.
In other words, you begin to take time (for yourself) to relax and recharge. Not only that, you begin to set goals for yourself that excite you for the future.
4. Making positive changes in your life
Having been in a toxic relationship, you may want to change some things in your life. And one way to achieve that is by trying out new hobbies or activities that you think are fun.
For example, you might want to learn to play a new instrument, try painting, or join a sports team. Or even taking a foreign language course or some adventurous traveling.
While doing all those things can help you feel good about yourself, they show you that you can achieve great things. And become anything you want to.
Also, you might decide to achieve changes in your body physique or your feelings. And that can mean eating healthier foods, exercising more, or getting more sleep.
And often, taking care of your body can help you feel better and stronger. However, you may also want to take charge of your emotional well-being by talking to someone like a therapist or doing things like meditation or journaling.
5. Greater clarity and perspective
In a relationship, people tend to feel diverse emotions, from positive ones to negative ones. Sadly, negativity tends to be intense for many people, especially when their relationships end badly.
But when you’re healing from a toxic relationship, you might start to feel better about thinking about what happened. And you might be able to think about it without feeling too upset.
You might start to appreciate what went wrong and what you need in a healthy relationship.
For example, you might think about times when you felt unhappy or disrespected in the relationship. You might also think about things you enjoyed and appreciated about the relationship.
But the good thing is that as you put these things into perspective, you begin to grasp what you want and need in a healthy relationship.
6. A Sense of Relief
Breaking up with someone who treated you poorly can be a tough choice. But it can also make your life better in many ways.
And one of the signs you’re healing after the breakup is you begin to feel different in a good way. You might feel lighter like a heavy burden got off your shoulders. Also, you might feel less stressed and anxious as you concentrate better on things that matter to you.
And often, that, in turn, makes you feel more peaceful. In other words, the moment you realized that you were in that toxic relationship, you may have felt like you were walking on eggshells, always worried about what would happen next.
But now that you’re out of that relationship, you might feel a sense of calm that you didn’t have before. Therefore, opening space for positivity and growth in your life.
7. Become more Self-compassionate
You’ll agree we all make mistakes and, of course, have challenges. But often, people who have been in and through different types of toxicity in their relationships may feel down always.
Why? You’d ask.
But the answer is simple: Self-guilt, showing the absence of self-compassion.
But when you’re healing from a bad relationship, you’ll notice that you begin to treat yourself well. In other words, you become kinder to yourself, even when things are tough.
In plain language, one of the signs that you’re no longer hurting is that you begin to forgive yourself when you make a mistake. (And keep going!)
Also, when you’re trying something new, you’re more likely to give yourself a chance to learn without getting mad at yourself for not being perfect right away.
Having learned the 7 signs you’re healing from a toxic relationship, you must remember that healing is a process. Though everyone’s journey is different.
That said, don’t hesitate to seek support from a therapist or counselor who can help guide you through the healing process. Especially, if you can’t see signs your heart is healing.
In addition, by taking care of yourself and doing things that make you happy, you’re creating happiness and joy.
That way, you can take control of your own life without depending on others to make you feel good.